School was back in session today at the high school across the street.

I tossed and turned most of the night, checking my phone clock at various hours as if I would be the one attending class.

After a five month absence, I had grown used to the relative quite. The lack of cars and music and shrieking and giggling that accompanied the arrival of students in the morning and announced their departure in the afternoon.

The ordered chaos brought a cadence to my day and I have felt slightly off balance without it.

The students arrived this morning with the usual fanfare. Loud music and false bravado hiding first day nerves.

Their departure however, was very different.

Students emerged subdued and hushed from the school. Wore their masks (a last minute mandate from the school board) all the way to their cars. Looked relieved rather than embarrassed, to see their parents (who had arrived earlier than necessary) waving them over. Drove off quickly without the usual honking and jeering, their bravado worn threadbare and thin.

It was a different chaos and a different cadence. One that felt heavy and weighted.

It was good to have the kids back, although I am not confident it will be for long.

It was good to have the kids back, changed as they are. More serious leaving than when they entered, more grown than they were five months ago when they last walked out through those doors.

It reminds me that the world has changed, and under the guise of “normal,” we have changed along with it.